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Bad Poems Page
Here you will find the work of great poets badly re-sprayed with a buffy theme. I went through a stage of playing with them- its great fun and I recomend it for your own amusment.
If you want to comment please email me or go to my fanfiction.net account http://www.fanfiction.net/profile.php?userid=182390 and leave a review if you like.
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Cleaning up your mess
Disclaimer: Don't own anything, just playing with someone elses toys.
A/N: How Spike might convince dawn to clean up, with The Sad Tale of Sara Cynthia Sylvia Stout being the theme ..
"Oh Dawnie, please don't scream and shout-
Dru would never take the bodies out!
She'd kill the fishes, and scrape her hands,
Catch the lunch and kiss her man
And though Angelus might scream and shout
She would NOT take the bodies out.
##
So they piled to the ceiling
Some not dead, throats a'healing,
There were mums, and little boys
Whom Darla tempted with some toys,
They filled the rooms, covered the floor
Cracked the windows and blocked the door
With writhing maggots, purple tongues
Drippy bits that had been lungs,
Fingers, thighs, curled up toes-
Darla said "They have to go!"
Angelus thought it not much fun
And he was not the only one!
Chunks of flesh, burnt and gross,
Greasy bits of something worse.
##
The bodies rolled on down the hall,
Under the roof, dripped on the floor,
Greasy eyeballs, vomit, cum,
Bits from where the bowls did run,
Electric wires from Marconi,
Tied up folks wet and moaney-
Little cages, bones all dry ...
Mouldy milkmen Dru ate with mustard,
Eyeballs filled with lukewarm custard,
Cold college girls, just rancid meat
-Hungry Drusilla they did meet.
##
At last the bodies reached so high
The smell! The vamps thought they would die.
And no one wanted to come and play
The neibours were all dead anyway
And finally Wil' the bloody had to shout
"Ok, I'LL take the bloody bodies out!"
##
But then of corse, it was too late,
The police they came from 'cross the state,
-In New York vamps they all did hate-
They found the bodies at any rate
And the coppers met an awful fate
That I can not right now relate
Because the hour is much too late,
But Dawnie remember, don't scream and shout-
Always take the bodies out!
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Sick Buffy
Disclaimer: Don't own them, or the meter of the poem, which is "Sick" by Shel Silverstein with new plates and a re-spray ..
##
I cannot go and slay today,
Listen Giles, to what I say!
I have the bruises, and some bumps,
A gash, my head has lumps.
If I go out, I'm sure I'll die-
I'm almost blind with this black eye!
Let Spike go out and get off his rocks- he's a Demon and loves Violence lots,
And his soul it helps to clean-
You know Giles I think your being mean!
I'm gonna cry-I feel so Blue...
If I don't go what can you DO?
I cough I sneeze, on dust I choke!
And lots of men my heart have broke,
I WILL not go! I'm staying in!
Yellow belly? Giving in?
My back is wrenched, my ankle sprained!
I get the flu each time it rains.
I am so tired, I just feel numb,
What you mean Dawn wants to come?
My arms are stiff, my hands are week-
Don't you listen when I speak?
Slayerrettes are filling up my house,
Pulling each others hair right out
My knees won't bend, that's what I hate
I feel like I am ninety-eight!
Your brain is shrunk!- you do not hear!
Sometimes I think that you don't care,
I broke a nail and my heart is- why?
What's that? Halloween you say? There is no need for patrol today?
Alright! Shopping time!
Grab credit card and I'm away!
My Fanfiction.net account
Some One Ate Our Dawnie ...... Spikes POV?
Don't own them- metres pulled off a shel Silverstein poem.
Someone ate our Dawnie!
I'm rather sad to say,
That someone ate out Dawnie
Inside I SAID to stay!
We'll never hear her whining cry,
Oh why oh WHY did she have to die?
The Key is gone, now, well, (sigh)
That someone ate our Dawnie.
##
Someone ate our Dawnie,
It's absolutely clear,
That someone ate our Dawnie
'cause the Dawnie ain't in here-
No more she'll borrow Buffy's clothes,
Or go on about how much she (Thinks) she knows
Oh well, that's just how it goes-
When someone eats our Dawnie.
##
Someone ate the Dawnie,
What a pretty thing to eat ....
Someone ate MY Dawnie-
I bet she tasted sweet.
It was a heartless thing to do,
The Scoobies do not have a clue
They really don't know that me, (not Dru)
Went and ate dear Dawnie.
Blackmarblesphere@yahoo.co.uk
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